Why do they always talk about "surviving school"? Since when did school become something detrimental enough to make survival questionable?
and should we even participate in activities that require survival?
sure, there are those that don't have much food to eat, and they fight for survival everyday.
but those of us that have inherited the wonders of modern american abundance, are life-threats necessary?
do we stay up late studying and crap just because it feels more comfortable?
or are we just stupid? Just how much brain is necessary to make an honest living? I mean seriously.
There are trillions of dollars being exchanged, everybody is a walking vault of at least $30 cash on them,... millions of ppl are surfing the internet with $250 in their paypal accounts, just waiting to give it around.
And you tell me you need a 4-year, $135,000 program to teach you how to tap into that?
That's what happens under fear.
irrationality.
it's what our government is carefully doing today.
Karl Rove & Co., couldn't be more happier with these multi-colored terror threats.
at first, after 9/11, I was genuinely scared.
but then the pattern of the media hype on terrorism and stuff just looked too planned, to well thoughtout.
it perfectly coincided with things like the Iraqi war or the Republican putsch.
fear leads to irrationality leads to external control
as soon as you cease to be rational, you lose your claim to free will.
But how does one stick out, how does one be that rock solid island of free independent thought.
baby, this is not an abstract ideal, you can't just meditate a calm journey through the bustling ocean that is your surroundings
check your environment. So much of how your mind grows is shaped by the context that you're in. If you're surrounded by people and programs, you're bound to only see yourself through the lens of your box.
you have to unchain yourself once in a while, take a retreat and do what they say, "find yourself"
and/or you need to abandon your environment or seek a multiplicity of freely chosen environments. How much of what you do is dependent on needs established before you chose to agree or disagree?
Money's important, mariage is important, school is necessary for a good existence, a large house, good car... these things have become "standard" even before we have begun to taste the real standards... nature... true love.... projects we have passion for... compassion for the needy.
Alas, it doesn't matter, my words don't matter in the end.
It's evolution.
We, as individual homo sapiens are fighting for our personal evolution just as much as other layers are fighting for their own space.
the virii in our body are fighting for their existence all the time--despite advances in medicine.
likewise, virii of the mind, such as religion.... also take their place.
just as do metropolii, organizations, capitalistic societies, socialistic dogma, etc...
so why not just give up? let this process go unchecked?
because they, this non-you, does not matter....
you are all that matters. As solipsistic as it sounds, none of these things exist without you.
With you, with your feelings, with your principles, with your ideas you should guide your actions...
I think this is the Existentialist mantra, and I think rejecting so would be an inauthentic and error-prone life.
Thursday, Aug 28, 2003
